How are we to be salt and light in our world? How do we counter the negative influence of fundamentalism in our own lives?

I think the best way to be salt is to look at what salt does:

First off, it adds flavor. We can add flavor to the world around us by allowing ourselves to transform the world through our message of Christ. There is nothing quite like adding salt to a bland soup to give it flavor, much like there is nothing quite like adding Jesus Christ to the heart of a bland human.

Secondly, salt preserves. We have the opportunity to preserve the Gospel Message by standing up for what we believe, becoming defenders of the faith like so many have before us. We must preserve the Gospel message through sound doctrine, teaching, and training, so as not to be led astray.

Finally, salt help fight infections. We have an opportunity to bring out the worst in people so that Christ can bring out the best in them. Sometimes we have to attack the rough parts of peoples lives before we can get connected to the source, the heart.

We can also be light much like we can be infection fighting salt. Darkness shrouds the senses, confusing judgment and decision making. Our light can shine and give guidance and direction in a world full of dark discrpeancies and misleadings.

We fight fundamentalism by showing ourselves trained and approved in the Gospel message, and subscribing to sound doctrine that can be backed up by the Word of God, by our traditions as a church, by our experiences, and by the use of reason. If we can use the 3 latter to support the former, we can effectively fight the misleadings of fundamentalism and liberalism, and continue to put out the track that God has set for our denomination.

Read scriptures on worship and praise of God. Reflect on a recent worship experience where you were fully engaged in worship and praise. Read the following selections and reflect on them.

When I think of Worship and Praise, I think of the 150th Psalm:

"Let Everything that has breath Praise the Lord (Verse 6)."

I can remember a service a couple of months ago where I felt like everything that had breath in the building was praising the Lord. I can remember the particular song that was being played coming to a crescendo of sorts, finding myself basking in the glory of the Father... it brought me to tears to think of the Amazing and Powerful Love that the Savior has for me. It brings my heart to praise his name in all aspects of my life. As the band Ever Stays Red says: "Every single breath that is in my chest is for you to glorify your name, I want to scream your name at the top of my lungs, until there is none."

God is so Very Good indeed!

Read biblical passages related to reason or the mind—love God with our minds; have the mind of Christ, etc.—and meditate on the role of reason or the mind in the Christian life. Read biblical passages that describe decisive spiritual experiences—Moses at the burning bush or Paul on the road to Damascus—and mediate on the nature of spiritual experience. Relate from your own spiritual journeys on these points—reason and experience.

As I look at these two different concepts - reason and experience, I find myself being attracted to both. I think the only thing that I am hesitant on when it comes to these two things is putting them on equal playing field with Scripture. I think often times reason and experience can be used to try to usurp the foundational Word of God. I think reason has been used to justify acts that the word of God has very strong language against, and I think experience is often used to view the Bible as an antiquated text that is no longer applicable to the "modern times" we live in. The truth is that scripture was revealed to man through experiences and through reasoning with the Lord; but our ideas and our ways of thinking should not overcome the word of God by any means.

Imagine yourself as a missionary in one of the areas that was explored in this lesson. Imagine how you would pray. What would be your focus? What would be your passion?

I think if I were a missionary in any of these areas I would be focusing my prayers on an ability to effectively communicate the Gospel to the people I was called to minister to. This could mean effectively learning a new language or customs, being prepared to blend in with the local culture, and speaking the Gospel message in ways that are easy to understand. I think often times the Word of God can be complicated by poor communication, and I would pray for quality, efficient communication.

I think my passion would be to ascertain the culture group I was ministering to and be willing and able to immerse myself in their culture, to become like them as Paul did to win them over. If that means compromising on everything that makes me comfortable in my culture except the values of the Gospel Message and the Word of God, then that is what I would have to do.

Write a prayer for personal or corporate spiritual renewal:

Father God, I pray for you to bring renewal! I pray for renewal in my own life, renewal in priorities, in my goals, and in my desires so that they can better match your will and your ways. I pray for renewal in the life of your Church, that it can further your kingdom through your message of good news in authentic, creative ways that will reach the people of this modern world we live. I praise your name for the great and mighty work your spirit can and will do in the hearts of humanity, and we praise your name for the great miracles that we will get to be a part of as joint heirs with Jesus Christ.

Amen

Wesley was a spiritual mentor to many of his followers—dialogue about the features of his mentoring and how it would impact your life.

I think Wesley's mentorship was much like the relationship Paul had to Timothy. Wesley was able to appoint, send out, and encourage individuals to build up the Kingdom of God. He was able to put together a systematic ministry, not just a simplistic, itinerant preaching ministry. Because of his organization and mentorship style, he was able to greatly impact England and North America, and the ancestors of his ministry are still reaching lives today. I think if I were to be mentored by Wesley, I would be more assured in the things I was preaching, I would be more emboldened to go out and fulfill the call given to me knowing that such a pillar in the history of the Church had my back. Its kind of hard to not see a very effective ministry coming out of Wesley's mentorship.

Focus on one of the hymns that was sung at the beginning of this lesson. What response did the hymn invoke in you?

A charge to keep I have,
A God to glorify,
A never-dying soul to save,
And fit it for the sky.

To serve the present age,
My calling to fulfill:
O may it all my powers engage
To do my Master’s will!

Arm me with jealous care,
As in Thy sight to live;
And O Thy servant, Lord, prepare
A strict account to give!

Help me to watch and pray,
And on Thyself rely,
Assured, if I my trust betray,
I shall for ever die.

I think the thing that resonates with me in this song is the high standard that the follower of Christ is held to. I have a charge to follow the will of Christ in my life, I have to be ready and willing to defend and account the Gospel Message at all times. I have to be willing to do the work of the Lord, not by my own strength, but on the shoulders of his strength. I have to be willing to run the race set out for me. It is a high call, a high standard, and a high charge to keep indeed.

Reflect on the sermons that you have read for this lesson. How have they made an impact on you personally? In what way have they influenced your life and ministry?

An Excerpt From Wesley's "The Scripture Way Of Salvation"

It is thus that we wait for entire sanctification; for a full salvation from all our sins, —from pride, self-will, anger, unbelief; or, as the Apostle expresses it, “go unto perfection.” But what is perfection? The word has various senses: here it means perfect love. It is love excluding sin; love filling the heart, taking up the whole capacity of the soul. It is love “rejoicing evermore, praying without ceasing, in everything giving thanks.”

I like this particular sermon because of the power given to sanctify the individual, not just to cleanse of sin, but to create a new mind set, to "transform" the mind as the apostle Paul details it. This sanctification creates a new way of living a perfect life, a life experiencing the love of Jesus Christ in a relational way. It is a love so powerful that it takes of the whole capacity of the soul, spilling out into the individual's relationships with others. Talk about some great sanctification power!

Footwashing

Reflect on the footwashing ceremony. How might you use this ceremony in your ministry?

I have a really hard time with footwashing. I have only done it once before, and it made me incredibly uncomfortable. I would have to get to a place where I was o.k. with it before I was willing to do it as an activity in my youth ministry. I think the best way to do it would be during a night of worship, where there is an opportunity for the teens to just contemplate and reflect on the power and grace of God. I think if it was done in the context of a special worship service, the teens might be more receptive to participate, and not get freaked out about it.

Refelecting on Saint Francis Xavier

Prayer by Saint Francis Xavier

Eternal God, Creator of all things, remember that You alone has created the souls of unbelievers, which You have made according to Your Image and Likeness. Behold, O Lord, how to Your dishonor many of them are falling into Hell. Remember, O Lord, Your Son Jesus Christ, Who so generously shed His Blood and suffered for them. Do not permit that Your Son, Our Lord, remain unknown by unbelievers, but, with the help of Your Saints and the Church, the Bride of Your Son, remember Your mercy, forget their idolatry and infidelity, and make them know Him, Who You have sent, Jesus Christ, Your Son, Our Lord, Who is our salvation, our life, and our resurrection, through Whom we have been saved and redeemed, and to Whom is due glory forever. Amen.
Xavier’s Poem of Love (1552)

My God, I love thee: not because I hope for heaven thereby, nor because they who love thee not must burn eternally.

Thou, O my Jesus, Thou didst me upon the Cross embrace; for me didst bear the nails and spear, and manifold disgrace.

And grief and torments numberless, and sweat of agony; yea, death itself; and all for me who was thine enemy.

Then why, O Blessed Jesus Christ, should I not love thee well? Not for the hope of winning heaven, nor of escaping hell;

Not with the hope of gaining aught, not seeking a reward; but as thyself hast loved me, o ever-loving Lord!

Even so I love thee and will love, and in thy praise will sing, solely because thou art my God, and my eternal King.

I love this prayer and poem because it gives the proper reasoning for loving God. It is not for the sake of gaining the retainer on a hell insurance policy, nor is it for gaining prominence or reward; it is because God loved us so much that he sent his son to die on a cross so we could have a reconciled relationship with him. It was not because of who were are, or some sort of special connection we have, but because the creator desires to be reconciled to his creation in humanity. Amazing love, that thou my God would die for me indeed!

Spiritual Exercises of St. Ignatius of Loyola

Here is an exercise excerpt from the work of St. Ignatius:

First Point. First: It seems that St. Peter and St. Andrew were called three times: first, to some knowledge; this is clear from St. John in the first Chapter: secondly, to follow Christ in some way with the purpose of returning to possess what they had left, as St. Luke says in the fifth Chapter: thirdly, to follow Christ our Lord forever, as St. Matthew says in the fourth Chapter and St. Mark in the first.

Second Point. Second: He called Philip, as is in the first Chapter of St. John, and Matthew as Matthew himself says in the ninth Chapter.

Third Point. Third: He called the other Apostles, of whose special call the Gospel does not make mention.

And three other things also would be to be considered:

The first, how the Apostles were of uneducated and low condition;

The second, the dignity to which they were so sweetly called;

The third, the gifts and graces by which they were raised above all the Fathers of the New and Old Testaments.

I think it especially important to look at the fact that the Apostles were of uneducated and low condition. It seems important to note that the men who would disseminate the Gospel Message all over the known world would be men of simple lives, including fishermen, tax collectors, and political activists. God transformed these simple men into the foundation of a Church that exists in billions of lives 2,000 years later. What a powerful statement God made through the lives of these uneducated men of low condition.

Amazing Grace

The prompt for this post is to sing Amazing Grace and discuss the power of the song and how it impacts me:

Amazing Grace, How Sweet the Sound, that saved a wretch like me, I once was lost, but now am found, was blind but now I see...

My Chains are gone, I've been set free, My God my savior, has ransomed me, and like a flood his mercy reigns... unending love, Amazing Grace.

I know that is the modern, Chris Tomlin version, but that to me is the power of the song. Because of that Amazing Grace, I have been set free. I have been ransomed from the sins I had no way of getting away from. His mercy reigns over my life, granting me the best life I can possibly have, both right now, and in the lifetime to come. His grace truly is Amazing, and I am glad that I am found, and that I can see.

Write in your journal. Read a portion of the Book of Common Prayer such as the Order for Morning Prayer or Order for Evening Prayer as a focus of reflection. What is the meaning of the prayers?

From the Order for Morning Prayer:

WHEN the wicked man turneth away from his wickedness that he hath committed, and doeth that which is lawful and right, he shall save his soul alive. Ezek. xviii. 27.
I acknowledge my transgressions, and my sin is ever before me. Psalm li. 3.
Hide thy face from my sins, and blot out all mine iniquities. Psalm li. 9.
The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit: a broken and a contrite heart, O God, thou wilt not despise. Psalm li. 17.
Rend your heart, and not your garments, and turn unto the Lord your God: for he is gracious and merciful, slow to anger, and of great kindness, and repenteth him of the evil. Joel ii. 13.
To the Lord our God belong mercies and forgivenesses, though we have rebelled against him; neither have we obeyed the voice of the Lord our God, to walk in his laws which he set before us. Daniel ix. 9, 10.
O Lord, correct me, but with judgment; not in thine anger, lest thou bring me to nothing. Jer. x. 24. Psalm vi. 1.
Repent ye; for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand. St. Matt. iii. 2.
I will arise and go to my father, and will say unto him, Father, I have sinned against heaven, and before thee, and am no more worthy to be called thy son. St. Luke xv. 18, 19.
Enter not into judgment with thy servant, O Lord; for in thy sight shall no man living be justified. Psalm cxliii. 2.
If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us; but if we confess our sins, God is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. 1 St. John i. 8, 9.

DEARLY beloved brethren, the Scripture moveth us, in sundry places, to acknowledge and confess our manifold sins and wickedness; and that we should not dissemble nor cloak them before the face of Almighty God our heavenly Father; but confess them with an humble, lowly, penitent, and obedient heart; to the end that we may obtain forgiveness of the same, by his infinite goodness and mercy. And although we ought, at all times, humbly to acknowledge our sins before God; yet ought we chiefly so to do, when we assemble and meet together to render thanks for the great benefits that we have received at his hands, to set forth his most worthy praise, to hear his most holy Word, and to ask those things which are requisite and necessary, as well for the body as the soul. Wherefore I pray and beseech you, as many as are here present, to accompany me with a pure heart, and humble voice, unto the throne of the heavenly grace, saying after me;

ALMIGHTY and most merciful Father; We have erred, and strayed from thy ways like lost sheep. We have followed too much the devices and desires of our own hearts. We have offended against thy holy laws. We have left undone those things which we ought to have done; And we have done those things which we ought not to have done; And there is no health in us. But thou, O Lord, have mercy upon us, miserable offenders. Spare thou them, O God, who confess their faults. Restore thou them that are penitent; According to thy promises declared unto mankind in Christ Jesu our Lord. And grant, O most merciful Father, for his sake; That we may hereafter live a godly, righteous, and sober life, To the glory of thy holy Name. Amen.

I find a great amount of meaning from reading this excerpt from the morning prayers. It kicks off the entire prayer sequence right where one should be before petitioning God, in a position prostrate before the Lord, requesting forgiveness for both things that one should not have done, and for things that one should have done and did nothing. I think often times we forget to seek the Lord's mercy in our prayers, to forgive us for the wrongs we have committed. So often, we have our checklist of requests ready to go, ready to lay them before the Lord without reconciling ourselves and making sure we are in right relationship with the Father. this prayer speaks volumes about what is required of a broken and contrite spirit, one ready to lay before the feet of Jesus as one unworthy.

The Redemptive work of Christ

The Journal Prompt:

Write a brief confession or affirmation of faith that expresses in concise form the essentials of our Wesleyan-Holiness perspective on God and salvation—the focus here is on God’s redemptive work.

God created all things, including humans in his own image. Sin entered the world and distorted the relationship between God and man. God longed to be reconcile with humanity, and sent his son, Jesus Christ, in the midst of our sin to act as a sacrifice to reconcile us from our sin. Because of Christ's sacrifice of redemption, we have an opportunity to live in right relationship with God and a hope for eternal life, the best life possible.

Areas of Reform in my Life

As I have been looking at the Reformation, it piques the question about the type of reform needed in my life. Now as I look at the entire block of assignments I have left to do in the next 26 hours, I think the biggest reform I need to make in my life is to re-prioritize. I guess I could try to make some excuses because it was district assembly week, but life happens and I have to adjust to the things life throws at me. My biggest reform is to spend less time wasting time, focusing on using my time in a better manner, so that I can spend the most time doing what I like to do and not crunching to finish up the things I have to do.

Reformation: Who is persecuting who?

I have been reading about the Protestant Reformation, and the general understanding is that the Roman Catholic Church persecuted Protestants who broke away from the church. Most Protestant Reform fell under the leadership of Luther, Zwingli, or Calvin. The only thing is that these same Protestant groups persecuted other protestants. the Anabaptists and Mennonites were groups that did not agree with the Roman Catholic and Protestant Reformers belief that the Church and State should be united. For this, they were mercilessly persecuted in Roman Catholic and Protestant Lands. It is in interesting to me to think that a group that broke away would be persecuted for being to far to the extreme to be in tune with mainstream protestantism. No wonder there are so many different denominations with so many different viewpoints. The Orange County Supertones put out a good question in their 1999 song "One Voice":

And can we sing with one voice, if we all love the same God, can we agree to disagree?

I think we can in spite of all the historical baggage. In spite of all the differences, God can work to build his church through all the different denominations. Different parts, one body.

A mighty fortress is our God

From a classic hymn by Martin Luther:

The Word they still shall let remain
Nor any thanks have for it;
He's by our side upon the plain
With His good gifts and Spirit.
And take they our life,
Goods, fame, child and wife,
Let these all be gone,
They yet have nothing won;
The Kingdom our remaineth.

I think this a classic line of a Job-like commitment to the Lord. Everything that is good in this life could be taken away, yet the Kingdom of God still remains! Everything in this life eventually could (and will) turn to dust, yet the Kingdom of God is eternal! It brings me hope in spite of any every turn life takes, in spite of every bit of adversity that comes in to my life, I can always cling to the hope of The Word of God and his Kingdom which will remain for all time and eternity. Thank God for that!

Disagreement in the Church

Journal Prompt: In many eras and locations, disagreements in the church cause both division and movements of reform. In his High-Priestly prayer (John 17), Jesus prayed “that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you.” With prayerful self-examination, reflect on and discuss areas of needed change in the Church today. Pray for God to bring renewal within His Church.

This prompt doesn't mince words by any means! Areas of needed change in the Church... I guess I would have to say that a major change that needs to take place in the modern American Church is the call to the American mission field. So often when we think of missionaries, we think of those in places like Africa, South America, and Asia. We think of people crossing over deserts, chopping through jungles, spreading the word of God with nothing but the clothes on their backs... Except I have a mission field of my own, right here in the United States, in my town, in my community, in my neighborhood. So often, the relationship between Christian and Church is a refueling station; the individuals goes to church to recharge, and leaves unwilling to disperse that energy into the lives of others.

This unusual non-dispersal of energy can be seen in the numbers of the church. The Church of the Nazarene currently stands at over 2 Million members, and 663,375 live in the USA or Canada. Those are tremendous numbers; Only the Africa region's 511,373 members comes even close to that. The problem is that USA/Canada's numbers haven't changed much in the last 10 years. In 2000, the church boasted 648,763 from USA/Canada, while Africa had 216,967 members. USA/Canada gains 15,000 members in 10 years while Africa adds 300,000 members in the same amount of time. Africa is a booming mission field, but America is a potential booming mission field as well, and it is important for us to be the Missionaries in "Jerusalem and Judea, and in Samaria, and to the ends of the Earth." If people in the Church began to treat right where they are at as a mission field, then we might start to see the kind of revival that would put this country back on the right track.

Digging back into history

It is time to welcome back all of my followers (and when I say followers, I mean my wife and my mother in law) to another round of course of study. This time we are going back into history of Christianity, from the Reformation Period through modern times. I want to take this first post to go through my expectations:

1) I want to learn more about the underlying causes of the Reformation. It is not as cut and dry as "people didn't agree with the Catholic Church, so they left". I want to further understand what caused the tension that brought about Catholics and Protestants, and how such a deep divide could occur.

2) I want to learn more about Calvin. His theology has a huge influence in the modern world, and I want to know why it is different from my own.

3) I want to learn more about Wesley. He is considered a theological patriarch of our denomination, and I want to know more about him and his ministry.

4) I want God to reveal to me through the history of his church my role in creating history. Like every other part of the body, I have a role to play, and I am hoping a survey of church history may reveal more of what God has for me now and in the future.

Blessings as you join me on this journey.

Approaches to Whole Life Stewardship

I did an assignment regarding several approaches to stewardship. Four approaches included self centered, self sacrificing, good intentioned, and biblical. I found myself laying in the biblical approach most of the time, with the exception of the money area. I find myself leaning more towards the saving aspect of money, rather than having a better balance between making, giving, and saving. I feel like it is very important to save "for a rainy day", because it seems like we have had a lot of those lately. The problem is that in my quest to save some money, I might be neglecting the opportunities Christ is presenting me to further his kingdom with my income. Lord, grant me the wisdom to know when to save and when to give!

Blogging about Stewardship

Stewardship is a very important task in the life of Christian. The giving of your money, your time, and your gifts and abilities is crucial to the life of the church as we know it. I for one believe in giving sacrificially; I have found very often in my life that I have never been out of things that I needed. I certainly have been not able to attain things that I want, but God in his infinite power and grace has blessed me far greater than anything I could ever do on my own. I believe with all of my heart that I am blessed that much because I commit to give what belongs to God first before I give what I feel I "deserve" for my work. Several times in the Old Testament, a variety of authors state "The Earth is the Lord's, and everything in it." It is important for me to be willing to give back what truly belongs to God in the first place. That is what stewardship is about.

Funding the Mission

The prompt for this journal reading asks how I feel about paying the local church apportionment to help support district and general church ministries. I think that support the district and especially the general church is essential! The Church of the Nazarene is growing all over the place, even in exponential numbers in certain places. With that in mind, it is vital to the health of the entire church to support global ministries. Part of this support is through encouraging and spurring the local church to pay the connectional budgets. The financial support is essential; It won't be long before there are more Nazarenes in places like Africa and South America than in the United States, and those places will need our support to further their exponential growth. Kingdom building all over the world... catch the fever!

Church Communication

This prompt wants me to discuss my feelings regarding the church reaching out to me in personal communication. As of late, I have been the beneficiary of some very high quality, care based communication. A group of ladies in the church started an encouragement ministry called Open Heart. These ladies do a variety of activities, but there main thrust is in writing letters. Birthday cards, Graduation cards, Military service cards, loss and grief cards... the list goes on. I have received several cards as of late, including two get well soon cards after my daughter recently had her tonsils and adenoids removed. I have been very blessed by the ministry that is leading the way in exemplifying good quality personal communication within my local church.

Time Management: Waste of Time?

I have to admit that I freely struggle with an effective use of time. It is so easy to get side tracked, to find myself distracted by the likes of profootballtalk.com and the endless pit of bargain deals known as Craig's list. Its easy to get caught up in a coffee break or an extended lunch time... When all of the sudden, I look up, and poof, its time to go home... except I didn't get my lesson planned for church. This applies even to this course, as I currently sit one week behind on my course work. I could make up a variety of excuses, but the truth is that I have none that can truly justify my disability to use my time better. This module has an active calendar, where you plan out every hour of your work week. Even though it is just for an assignment, I am going to try to use it, to see what happens. I guess we will go from there.

Look! Another Big Idea

From the reading:

After a motion is made in the decision group, the implementation of the idea depends on delegation and her friends—programming and follow- through.

I think I have a good grasp on programming and follow through. I feel like I can create a program and effectively implement it, and follow up that it is working the way it is intended to work, and that it is effective. I think the delegation aspect is a harder one for me to let out of my grasp. I find often in youth ministry that it is my baby, these are my teens, and I have a hard time letting go of responsibility for them. If I delegate a task to someone else and they don't follow through, I as the youth pastor am still responsible for their failure. Their failures reflect on me, even though they aren't my failures. The problem is that I can't minister to the youth of my church by myself; I need the delegated help of others. I hope as I grow in ministry that I can move beyond the point of control, and let God work in the hearts and minds of those he calls to work in ministry.

Being a Leader in the Church

This is my reflection on what it means to be a leader in the church. I truly am blessed and honored to be in a position of working with Youth in Owyhee County. I feel that God has called me for such a season as this, he has gifted me in working with these young people, and I am encouraged by the growth in spirit and in number I have seen recently. I think things are going well in leadership because I am following God's will for my life, and because of that, he is blessing me richly, not just in ministry, but in marriage, in relationships, in finances... everything! It is a high calling to be a leader in a church, but it is one that brings blessings by the handful.

Devoted to giving my money

I have found that being able to give of my money for tithes and offerings has never really been a problem for me. The truth is that every good and wonderful thing I have in my life is a gift from God; he gives me everything that I have! Repeatedly it is said in the scripture "The Earth is the Lord's and everything in it." I am thankful that God has blessed me so much that he would give me an interest free, long term loan on all of his stuff that I currently have in my possession. With all that God gives me, 10% is a paltry sum in consideration of the remaining 90% plus in stuff and blessings I receive in return. The return on investment is exponential; in my entire life as a committed tither, I have never had to worry about coming up with the money I needed to pay a bill. I have never found my self in want, and it is because of the blessing of God that makes that very thing possible. I praise his name, and want to continue to serve him with my finances.

Let me hit you with some Knowledge

So, I have to admit something to you. I am studying to be a Pastor in the Nazarene Church, and I probably don't know the Nazarene Manual that well. I led a class of high school kids in a bible study tonight, and they had some tough questions that needed answers. I knew the answers, but had a memory block, or couldn't remember a particular word. I was trying to explain the Wesleyan Quadrilateral, and got Scripture, Tradition, and Reason out no problem... the last one was on the tip of my tongue, couldn't remember the word my brain was looking for... finally it dawned on me after having to look it up that it was experience, that was the part of the quadrilateral I was missing. I have to admit that I feel convicted not for a lack of knowledge and understanding of Nazarene doctrine, but at my ability to clearly communicate what I believe in words that make sense. This makes me a bit nervous for my district license interviews coming up this month.

The Chandelier

The new young pastor received a generous donation from an anonymous source for the exact price of a new chandelier for the foyer of the church. So at the next regular, monthly board meeting, he proposed that a motion be made to purchase a chandelier. One board member said, “We’ve never done it before.” Another said, “We don’t need it.” The church treasurer said, “We need that money for something else.” The chairman of the trustees said, “We should buy new lights for the foyer first.” The board secretary said, “I don’t know how to spell it.” And the last straw—a comment by another board member, “Who would play it?”

I think this story is a humorous reminder of what great responsibility the leadership of the church has in taking care of Christ's local church. There is a fine balance in spending money in a church, and questions of affordability, necessity, priority, and profitability all come into play when making a major decision in regard to the church. It is my hope that as I grow in relationship with the leaders of my church, that these questions will be opportunities for the board to lean heavily on God to provide the means necessary to equip our church to reach the lost. The key is following what God wants us to do as stewards of his money, personally and communally.

Blogging Fatigue

I have to admit, that this is the most difficult part about doing a course of study. It is so easy to go through the work, and leave the journaling by the wayside. So here goes, trying to pick up what I struggle with and make it a habit. A thought from this reading:

"Progress requires change, and change almost always causes resistance or conflict."

I think this follows another saying that "change is the only constant". This is not completely true, because I would say that change in a church setting is an incredibly slow process, not one meant to be undertaken swiftly or without prayerful consideration and careful planning. I think that is one thing I like about working in the youth department, because youth ministry is wild, crazy, against the grain. You are allowed to do any off the wall idea in youth because youth ministry is goofy and fun loving. Does that mean that youth ministry can be done without prayerful consideration and careful planning? Yes it does, although it would be done rather poorly.

I think the biggest issue in creating change needs to be this: the change initiator should be building open doors and bridges, not lines in the sand. A great deal of compromise is necessary for significant and effective change to take place. Also, an even greater deal of patience is mandatory.

Cost Benefit Analysis

"Every decision has its costs, rewards, and consequences."

I think this is an important statement for anyone in ministry, and people in general. I remember learning in economics about an opportunity cost. For every decision I make, there is an opportunity cost; I choose to eat chocolate ice cream, my opportunity cost was vanilla ice cream (or any other flavor of ice cream I might have picked). For every decision I make as leader of the youth ministry, there is an opportunity that I am taking out of the picture by doing whatever I decided to do. It puts high priority on the decisions that you make.

Planning to Plan

Another idea:

Planning—the art of leading the voyage to the future—takes energy, savvy, time, courage, and patience.

I think the one that I have the hardest time with in regard to planning is patience. I think it is difficult to execute a plan and wait for the plan to take effect... the other problem is having patience when I don't think the plan is going the way I think it is going. My youth pastor taught me something in high school that has always helped me to remember patience. He taught that God never gives you patience, he gives you the opportunity to practice patience. He told us as Christians it was important to PP (pee-pee), or to "practice patience". So remember when you try to execute a plan and it takes a while to unfold, or it doesn't go the way you plan, you have to remember to pee-pee.

Kingdom Building

Another note:

For Kingdom expansion, congregational health, disciples’ spiritual development, and the multiplication of a pastor’s ministry, every lay leader must be challenged to become a member of a ministry team and shown how to do it.

This is an important thing, because if a Pastor can effectively challenge church members, they will take on the work they are called to do, and they will own the work that God has planned out for them. The scary part and the challenge is the reality that if I don't do my part to help lead and equip people to do the work they are called to do, then I am hindering their ability to minister... It is certainly a tall order to be a minister.

Inhuman resources?

A thought:

Every church has an abundance of nonhuman resources that are sometimes overlooked and thus seldom fully utilized.

I think of two of the rooms that are part of the youth department. One of them has a pool table in it that basically takes up the entire room; it gets used about once a week, if I remember to unlock the doors. The other room is filled with an air hockey table and two foosball tables, used once a week again, if I remember to open the room. I fully intend to sell some of this stuff, because in the scope of things, it is not a good use of space to have those in there. I could see something like a ping pong table getting great use in a room like that, mainly because a ping pong table is completely portable, and can be moved from one room to the next. Creating functionality in the space given to you is crucial, effective use of space can aid in effective ministry.

The Big Idea

Here is a note from this week's reading:

God provides resources for His Church.

I think this is important to think about, because it is not my own work or effort that makes resources available, it is God in all his mighty power that provides the resources for His church. When I do the work he has called me to do, he is going to provide me with everything I need, including funding, equipment, and the right people to help. It is when I try to force things to happen that I am frustrated with the resources, placing someone in a position that they are not qualified to work in. It is up to me to be a good steward of the resources God has given me.

From C.H. Spurgeon

Reflect on the quote from C. H. Spurgeon (Lectures to My Students, Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 1954, 32.): “We must feel that woe is unto us if we preach not the gospel; the word of God must be unto us as a fire in our bones, otherwise, if we undertake the ministry, we shall be unhappy in it, shall be unable to bear the self-denials in it, and shall be of little service to those among whom we serve.”

This quote seems like it is speaking of the motivation to be called to ministry. One must not go into the ministry because he/she "likes working with teens", or enjoys the social aspects of ministry, but one must only follow the call into ministry if there exists a burning desire to see the Gospel of Jesus Christ proclaimed to all. It is Christ and Christ alone that we serve in ministry, and when ministry's focus changes from Christ to selfish ambition or vain conceit, it only becomes a discouraging and frustrating endeavor.

Competence and Character

From this week's reading:

"The need of the church and the personal need of the pastor is to be spiritual and emotionally well, to serve effectively, and to finish well."

This stands out to me because it is not mutually exclusive; the church and the pastor both require this type of health, because a leader who is not emotionally or spiritually well cannot lead and serve effectively. I also like that it adds in the fact that one must finish well... I think often pastors leave positions in times of angst and adversity. I think that a pastor's spiritual and emotional health could be a good indicator on whether or not that pastor will finish well... A pastor who does not take care of his health opens himself up to conflict and defensiveness, and could find him/herself ignoring the direction of God for their charged congregation, and doing more damage than any potential good.

Self Management

Here is the latest thought from Church Administration:

Church members, coworkers, potential believers, acquaintances, and even those who are almost strangers—inside and outside the church—expect a spiritual leader to demonstrate credibility, integrity, authenticity, and personal piety.

I think I have the categories of credibility, integrity, and authenticity down pretty good. Personal piety is one I have always struggled with, even in the midst of being a pastor. It is so easy to get sidetracked by everything going on. I can't remember how many times I have looked at the devotional book sitting on my night stand, looking at the clock, and saying to myself "I'll do it in the morning", only to find myself waking up late, blitzing out the door, and forgetting what I committed to do the night before. It takes discipline to be able to maintain a daily devotion time, and I struggle mightily with that. It is my hope that maintaining this journal can help jump start my devotion time. One encouraging aspect is that our family has decided to read the one year Bible together. We are only a week behind, but we are fully committed to sticking with it. Lord willing, we will read the entire bible this year.

My Feelings On Administration

The concept of being a pastor has never been equated with administrator. The classic joke is that a pastor has the greatest job in the world because he or she only has to work one day a week, in the pulpit on Sunday morning. That is the pastor aspect of the job, and it is a small fraction of the actual work. The work of administrator is a huge portion of the actual work of a pastor. It is this type of work that makes me the most nervous about being a pastor. It is the behind the scenes stuff that no one understands that defines the work of the pastor. Most people only rate the Pastor's finished product; the sermon, the programming, the bible study he/she puts together. It is the building and facilitating of work and workers, the growing and maturity of congregants, that truly defines the work of the Pastor. I find that I can produce an excellent sermon series, a crazy activity to play at youth group, or a top notch bible study, and if I don't go and make calls to people, If I don't facilitate the work of my department, if I don't do all the behind the scenes stuff, I am burned out and frustrated when I don't see any growth and maturity in my young congregants. The administrative work is the glue that holds the Pastor's work together, and it should not be taken lightly.

Back for Church Administration

It has been several months since I have posted on this blog. A lot has happened since then. I have graduated from College, and am a Social Scientist (whatever that means). I am now enrolled in a wonderful course called administering the local church. This is the first time I have taken a course of study without the burden of a full time college course load, so I am anticipating a better commitment to regular, if not daily, journaling. A new approach this time around will be to journal about insights, "ah-ha" moments I have in the reading. I will post the phrase or comment, and expound a little bit on that. Let's try it out:

Several basic issues about administration are clear:
Budgets, facilities, calendars, and programs can and should be managed.
People are to be led but not managed.
As a branch manager of the eternal church of the living God, be sure to operate from a higher level than mere business strategies.

I think these are very interesting in that a church administrator is called to run a holy business. I have worked in sales for my father for almost 10 years now, and have seen the workings of a small business. The church cannot be treated exactly the same as a small business, because it is the business of kingdom building. It is a business because finances, buildings, curriculum, and all that stuff has to be coordinated and executed properly, but it is more than business because the bottom line is souls saved for the kingdom. One cannot live by business plan alone, but work with the hearts and souls and minds of a variety of people who mostly volunteer their time, energy, effort, and money to further the kingdom building business. What a tall order a church administrator is called to.

Rule of Life Number 3

Element 3: Fidelity to the Church

Scripture Reference: Romans 12:4-6: Just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we who are many form one body, and each member belongs to all the others. We have different gifts, according to the grace given us. If a man's gift is prophesying, let him use it in proportion to his faith.

The Church is an extension of Christ. When one becomes a follower of Christ, he or she becomes part of the body of Christ. Each person who is a part of the body is designed to serve a special and unique role within the body, a role not designed for or fulfilled by anyone else. Fidelity to the Church means working in the area that God has gifted and called the individual to work in. To not fulfill the call of the body of Christ is to leave the body lacking in its effectiveness. Fidelity to the Church does not equate to fidelity with God; it is very easy for someone to neglect a growing relationship with God in the name of fulfilling fidelity to one’s work within the church. As a pastor, it is especially important to not put fidelity to my work in the church as a priority over God and my family.

Reading back on this rule, I can see how a lot of people can miss out on this crucial aspect of life. The old saying in the church is that 95% of the work that gets done is accomplished by 5% of the people in the church. So often we find ourselves coming to the church to get filled up, to have our needs met, to ask "What can the church do for me today?" More often we should be asking ourselves "What can I do to be an effective part of the body of Christ?" Maybe being effective is trying out something new, giving a particular area of ministry a shot. I found out very quickly through serving in various volunteer positions that Children's ministries wasn't a good fit for me for the long haul. I can most certainly volunteer to help with crafts during vacation bible school, because that is 15 hours during one week out of the entire year, and I can volunteer in the Nursery every once in a while, but to consistently volunteer in Children's ministries would drive me crazy. The key to effective, fulfilling work in the body of Christ is finding your fit in ministry and actually putting out the effort to work in that ministry. It truly can be a very rewarding experience to have fidelity to your church.

Posting Fatigue

I have finally reached the point where Christian History is fatiguing me. As I type, I am trying to race against the clock to beat the death of my computer battery, So if I seem brief, you know why. This is the beginning of week 11; two weeks to go, two major projects to finish. I think I am getting an excess of fatigue because my workload over the week has forced me to spend most of my Sunday working on homework. Needless to say, it does not make for a relaxing Sabbath. It is my hope that I can continue to bring you the greatest Christian History has to offer, without trying to cram it all into one day. One major insight I will give you form this week is in regard to my viewing of Roman Catholic and Eastern Orthodox Church services. I have to admit, I had my own preconceived notions of what I like and disliked about my own home church service, yet when I got involved in the Liturgy and unfamiliarity of the Catholic and Orthodox services, I must say I am very thankful that I attend a Nazarene Church. The music alone was enough to make me go crazy. I know that there are different strokes and preferences for different folks, but if the protestant church hadn't broken away in 1517 for the reasons that it did, I think it would certainly break away in 2010 for the kind of music they were rockin' in that house. No offense to Catholics or Orthodox, if that it the way you worship, no disrespect, but it certainly is not my cup of tea by any means.

Rule of Life: Rule Number 2

Here is the second addition to my rule of life. Let me briefly remind you that my rule of life is built around the concept of fidelity; the first rule being fidelity to God. The second rule is as follows:

Fidelity to Family

Scripture Reference: 1 Timothy 5:7-9: Give the people these instructions, too, so that no one may be open to blame. If anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for his immediate family, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.

This element is listed second because the family is a fundamental building block of societal living. It is through the family that traditions and values are passed down. It is through the family that priorities are established, and people gain an appreciation and understanding for what is important in life. The family is an essential aspect to the growth and development of individuals; there is not a structure in our modern society that has a greater influence than the family. It is important that an individual have Fidelity to his or her family, being sure to take care of the needs of his/her family members. As the passage describes, one who neglects his family is in a precarious position. Beyond one’s relationship with God, nothing in this world can take a greater precedence than one’s commitment to his or her family.

I find that I have a difficult time with this particular rule. It is often so easy to place other things, good things, in front of my commitment to my family. Many times have I been guilty of scheduling some appointment or event without the consultation of my family, and each time they are the ones that have to pay for my lack of consideration. It is with great hope that I can look to the good Lord, and to my family, that they may help me keep on track in maintaining fidelity to them, because the family truly is a crucial building block to maintaining Fidelity and I would go so far as to say maintaining inner peace and overall health in an individual's life.

Augustine Six Pack

AUGUSTINE’S CONFESSIONS, READING 6

BOOK FIVE

A year of decision. Faustus comes to Carthage and Augustine is disenchanted in his hope for solid demonstration of the truth of Manichean doctrine. He decides to flee from his known troubles at Carthage to troubles yet unknown at Rome. His experiences at Rome prove disappointing and he applies for a teaching post at Milan. Here he meets Ambrose, who confronts him as an impressive witness for Catholic Christianity and opens out the possibilities of the allegorical interpretation of Scripture. Augustine decides to become a Christian catechumen.

CHAPTER III

3. Let me now lay bare in the sight of God the twenty-ninth year of my age. There had just come to Carthage a certain bishop of the Manicheans, Faustus by name, a great snare of the devil; and many were entangled by him through the charm of his eloquence. Now, even though I found this eloquence admirable, I was beginning to distinguish the charm of words from the truth of things, which I was eager to learn. Nor did I consider the dish as much as I did the kind of meat that their famous Faustus served up to me in it. His fame had run before him, as one very skilled in an honorable learning and pre-eminently skilled in the liberal arts. And as I had already read and stored up in memory many of the injunctions of the philosophers, I began to compare some of their doctrines with the tedious fables of the Manicheans; and it struck me that the probability was on the side of the philosophers, whose power reached far enough to enable them to form a fair judgment of the world, even though they had not discovered the sovereign Lord of it all. For you are great, O Lord, and you have respect unto the lowly, but the proud you know afar off. You draw near to none but the contrite in heart, and canst not be found by the proud, even if in their inquisitive skill they may number the stars and the sands, and map out the constellations, and trace the courses of the planets.

I have to admit that I am convicted by the phrase "you draw near to none but the contrite in heart, and canst not be found by the proud". I am guilty of falling into this category at times, allowing my pride to get the best of me. It is difficult, because pride has a tendency to get in the way of a lot of relationships, specifically, with God, family, friends, coworkers, even the oppressed and needy. It is my hope that being only 24 and aware of the dangers of my pride, that I may be able to (with the good Lord's help) stop that pride in its tracks, and maintain a respectful relationship as one of the lowly followers of God.

My Rule of Life

Yesterday, one of my five term projects was due. These five projects are the type that are designed to be worked on for the entire course, with one due every week for the last five weeks of the course. This first project... did not get started until yesterday afternoon, with a deadline of midnight. Needless to say I got it done, and I hope that I get a decent grade on it.

The project was designed for me to write a personal rule of life, a way of living in a committed relationship with Jesus Christ in the modern world. It was designed to include five different elements of living. I decided that all of my rules would be built around the concept of fidelity, or loyalty. Loyalty is a very sought and honorable trait, and I thought it fitting that my rule of life would fit around that idea. Here is my first rule of life, quoted from my paper:

"Fidelity to the Triune God

Scripture Reference: Mark 12:29-31: The most important one," answered Jesus, "is this: 'Hear, O Israel, the Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength. The second is this: 'Love your neighbor as yourself. There is no commandment greater than these."

This element is listed first because it is the most important in my rule of life. Fidelity to God is crucial to living an authentic life of devotion to God. Fidelity to God means putting God at the top of our list of priorities, and growing in an active and loving relationship with him. The best example of fidelity to God comes from a saying I heard from my Wife: When you don’t take time out of your day to grow in relationship with God, any insignificant, miniscule, unimportant thing you did in that day will be deemed as a higher priority than God. Fidelity to God is found in quality relationship building, by reading his word, doing his will, communicating thoughts and feelings in prayer, and praising and worshiping his name. One who does these things with humility and joy is living a life of Fidelity to God."

As I read this over again, I am drawn back again to the theme of putting God at the top of our list for priorities. This challenges me, because to put God at the top of the list means to think and see with the eyes of God, to feel the heart of God breaking in compassion for people, to be the hands and feet of God, to be the one to say "Here am I Lord, send me!" It is my hope that I can commit and maintain fidelity to my Lord.

Augustine strikes back, part five

AUGUSTINE’S CONFESSIONS, READING 5

BOOK FOUR

This is the story of his years among the Manicheans. It includes the account of his teaching at Tagaste, his taking a mistress, the attractions of astrology, the poignant loss of a friend that leads to a searching analysis of grief and transience. He reports on his first book, De pulchro et apto, and his introduction to Aristotle’s Categories and other books of philosophy and theology, which he mastered with great ease and little profit.

CHAPTER I

1. During this period of nine years, from my nineteenth year to my twenty-eighth, I went astray and led others astray. I was deceived and deceived others, in varied lustful projects—sometimes publicly, by the teaching of what men and women style “the liberal arts”; sometimes secretly, under the false guise of religion. In the one, I was proud of myself; in the other, superstitious; in all, vain! In my public life I was striving after the emptiness of popular fame, going so far as to seek theatrical applause, entering poetic contests, striving for the straw garlands and the vanity of theatricals and intemperate desires. In my private life I was seeking to be purged from these corruptions of ours by carrying food to those who were called “elect” and “holy,” which, in the laboratory of their stomachs, they should make into angels and gods for us, and by them we might be set free. These projects I followed out and practiced with my friends, who were both deceived with me and by me. Let the proud laugh at me, and those who have not yet been savingly cast down and stricken by you, O my God. Nevertheless, I would confess to you my shame to your glory. Bear with me, I beseech you, and give me the grace to retrace in my present memory the devious ways of my past errors and thus be able to “offer to you the sacrifice of thanksgiving.” For what am I to myself without you but a guide to my own downfall? Or what am I, even at the best, but one suckled on your milk and feeding on you, O Food that never perishes? What indeed is any man, seeing that he is but a man? Therefore, let the strong and the mighty laugh at us, but let us who are “poor and needy” confess to you.

I like Augustine's use of the phrase "by the teaching of what women and men style the liberal arts". Out of all of the college classes I have taken, the courses that are associated with the Liberal Arts have been the ones that have tried to provoke and challenge my beliefs. The liberal artists seem to be the "wise", the "thinkers" of our time. I have to remind myself that the wisdom of the most wise people does not match up to the mere foolishnesses of our good Lord Jesus Christ. In my experience in college, the liberal artists, the wise, the philosophers, entered into a period of transcendence, ending up not really believing much of anything. That is why I think it is important that our young people who are getting ready to leave their homes and their church homes to go to college have a firm and strong foundation in what they believe, so they can be prepared to defend their faith when any opportunity arises.

The Split between East and West

One of the major readings in my Christian History Class is in regard to the split between the two branches of Christianity that make up what is now today the Eastern Orthodox Church and the Roman Catholic Church. One of the main things that I find interesting is that something simple as language differences contributed to the separation of the church. In the West, the churches used Latin, while in the East, the churches used Greek. This difference may appear somewhat trivial, but from language culture develops, and from culture, rituals and differences in understanding develop. Ultimately, it would be a political event that would separate the two churches, yet something that appears as minor, like language, contributed in a big way. It brings me back to the power of our words, and the way we use them to communicate with people. Differences in language produce differences in understanding; I have to admit, I am one of the many people who is guilty of trying to convince someone who doesn't understand the English language that if I speak slowly and loudly to them, they will know exactly what I mean. I am also one who is very guilty of saying something to my spouse in plain English, and not meaning it the way it comes out (Again, I apologize for all of those things I said, for there are many). It brings back the point that it is important to use our words wisely, not in a way that cuts people down, but in a way that builds them up.

My main Man Augustine, Part IV

AUGUSTINE’S CONFESSIONS, READING 4

BOOK THREE

The story of his student days in Carthage, his discovery of Cicero’s Hortensius, the enkindling of his philosophical interest, his infatuation with the Manichean heresy, and his mother’s dream whichforetold his eventual return to the true faith and to God.

CHAPTER I

1. I came to Carthage, where a caldron of unholy loves was seething and bubbling all around me. I was not in love as yet, but I was in love with love; and, from a hidden hunger, I hated myself for not feeling more intensely a sense of hunger. I was looking for something to love, for I was in love with loving, and I hated security and a smooth way, free from snares. Within me I had a dearth of that inner food that is yourself, my God—although that dearth caused me no hunger. And I remained without any appetite for incorruptible food—not because I was already filled with it, but because the emptier I became the more I loathed it. Because of this my soul was unhealthy; and, full of sores, it exuded itself forth, itching to be scratched by scraping on the things of the senses. Yet, had these things no soul, they would certainly not inspire our love. To love and to be loved was sweet to me, and all the more when I gained the enjoyment of the body of the person I loved. Thus I polluted the spring of friendship with the filth of concupiscence and I dimmed its luster with the slime of lust. Yet, foul and unclean as I was, I still craved, in excessive vanity, to be thought elegant and urbane. And I did fall precipitately into the love I was longing for. My God, my mercy, with how much bitterness didst you, out of your infinite goodness, flavor that sweetness for me! For I was not only beloved but also I secretly reached the climax of enjoyment; and yet I was joyfully bound with troublesome tics, so that I could be scourged with the burning iron rods of jealousy, suspicion, fear, anger, and strife.

I have to admit that I am at a loss of words in how to describe what I just read. It seems that Augustine was looking for love in all the wrong places, and when he finally found the loving kindness of God in Christ Jesus, he was truly changed. His life was no longer empty, but joyful.

I am amazed at the great lengths of detail that Augustine goes about in describing his depravity. He truly seems to be a man who found himself on the bottom of the barrel, yet it was God who delivered him from his depravity. Praise be to the one who brought Augustine, and myself out of that depravity.

The Crusades

I read a little bit of history about the Crusades today. I have to admit, the Crusades intrigue me. I watched the movie "Kingdom of Heaven", which is loosely based on events that happened during the crusades, and the dynamic political situation that developed in that movie got me thinking "How much of this is factual and true?" Needless to say that the movie producers took some liberties to sensationalize the plot, yet the movie very well depicts what was happening, namely a geographical movement for power and land. If you look back at the Crusades, there was just as much infighting among the differing Christian and Muslim factions as there were between Christian and Muslim. A Muslim group would fight a Christian group, then fight a Muslim Group, and vice-versa. It was interesting to me that some would take what was originally a Papal decree, a call to arms, as a way and means to further propagate power through the European feudal system of decreeing land to those considered "worthy" of controlling it. I think that is a major aspect that does not get mentioned; the Crusades had lots of political elements in line with the moral call to arms.

Augustine's Confessions, Part III

Here is another reading from Augustine:

AUGUSTINE’S CONFESSIONS, READING 3

BOOK TWO

He concentrates here on his sixteenth year, a year of idleness, lust, and adolescent mischief. The memory of stealing some pears prompts a deep probing of the motives and aims of sinful acts. “I became to myself a wasteland.”

CHAPTER I

1. I wish now to review in memory my past wickedness and the carnal corruptions of my soul—not because I still love them, but that I may love you, O my God. For love of your love I do this, recalling in the bitterness of self-examination my wicked ways, that you may grow sweet to me, you sweetness without deception! You sweetness happy and assured! Thus you may gather me up out of those fragments in which I was torn to pieces, while I turned away from you, O Unity, and lost myself among “the many.” For as I became a youth, I longed to be satisfied with worldly things, and I dared to grow wild in a succession of various and shadowy loves. My form wasted away, and I became corrupt in your eyes, yet I was still pleasing to my own eyes—and eager to please the eyes of men and women.

CHAPTER IV

9. Theft is punished by your law, O Lord, and by the law written in men and women’s hearts, which not even ingrained wickedness can erase. . . . Yet I had a desire to commit robbery, and did so, compelled to it by neither hunger nor poverty, but through a contempt for well doing and a strong impulse to iniquity. For I pilfered something that I already had in sufficient measure, and of much better quality. I did not desire to enjoy what I stole, but only the theft and the sin itself. There was a pear tree close to our own vineyard, heavily laden with fruit, which was not tempting either for its color or for its flavor. Late one night—having prolonged our games in the streets until then, as our bad habit was—a group of young scoundrels, and I among them, went to shake and rob this tree. We carried off a huge load of pears, not to eat ourselves, but to dump out to the hogs, after barely tasting some of them ourselves. Doing this pleased us all the more because it was forbidden. Such was my heart, O God, such was my heart—which you did pity even in that bottomless pit. Behold, now let my heart confess to you what it was seeking there, when I was being gratuitously wanton, having no inducement to evil but the evil itself. It was foul, and I loved it. I loved my own undoing. I loved my error—not that for which I erred but the error itself. A depraved soul, falling away from security in you to destruction in itself, seeking nothing from the shameful deed but shame itself."

Wow. I think Augustine has summed up one of the major reasons we so quickly and easily fall into sin. It is "I loved my own undoing. I loved my error - not that for which I erred but the error itself". I think that is a great example of why sin is so appealing. It is very enjoyable; there are a lot of things that are bad and hurtful to humanity that make a person feel very, very good. When one is absorbed in his or herself, one seeks only that which avoids pain and brings on pleasure, to use the hedonist viewpoint. The hedonist does that which brings pleasure for the sake of having pleasure, regardless of the moral outcome.

I like Augustine's awareness of what he did, and how far he has come. I love his use of the word "unity" in relationship to God, and finding himself among "the many", stuck in the sin of his life. His story is one of power and victory indeed, that God could redeem such a "depraved soul, falling away from security in you to destruction in itself". This is not uncommon, this is the story of Jesus Christ working in the hearts of humanity. Praise to the great redeemer, who redeems humanity from the pits of destruction.

The Eastern & Western Churches

I have to admit, I am in that middle of the course point where I am struggling to maintain and keep up with the pace. Today being Saturday, I just finished my last assignment... that was due on Sunday, five days ago. Now I can begin on the work that is due on Sunday at Midnight, which conveniently happens to be tomorrow. Did I also mention that I am leaving Sunday afternoon to go to Senior High Summer Camp? I certainly have my work cut out for me if I am going to make this upcoming deadline. It is so easy to get off track in these course, and I am beginning to learn that it still applies in my life overall. It is so easy to get busy with everything else going on in life, that one can quickly lose focus of what is important, and what needs to be taken care of. It is my prayer as I reach the midway point of this course that the good Lord will grant me with the discernment and the strength to better prioritize my time to further execute my responsibilities for this class. With his help, I know I can do it!

Now I can tell you about what I have been studying, specifically, the differences between the Western Catholic and the Eastern Orthodox church, Neither of which can hold snuff to the sweet glory of Nazarene Protestantism :) . All kidding and ribbing aside, it is very interesting to me that the things that really make the Catholic and Orthodox churches different aren't bad. The Catholic church has a set structure and hierarchy, while the Orthodox church is more of a confederation of 16 different churches, some of which are National Churches, while others are part of a Nation. In spite of their differences, they still hold to the truth that Jesus Christ, the Son of God, came to this earth to save humanity of its sins. These Churches, like Protestantism, have not lost sight of the good news of Jesus Christ, and his ability to grant eternal life to all who choose to believe in him. So I refer back to the poetic wisdom of the Orange County Supertones, that we can sing with one voice, and that we can agree to disagree on certain things, because we all love the same God. Now this goes without saying that their are certain things that are not negotiable, but their are other things that are more flexible. Let us, as the universal Church of Jesus Christ, strive to do what Jesus came to do, Namely, to seek and to save that which was lost.

Augustine's Confessions, Part 2

Here is the second reading on Augustine:

Augustine’s Confessions, Reading 2

CHAPTER V

5. Who shall bring me to rest in you? Who will send you into my heart so to overwhelm it that my sins shall be blotted out and I may embrace you, my only good? What are you to me? Have mercy that I may speak. What am I to you that you should command me to love you, and if I do it not, art angry and threaten vast misery? Is it, then, a trifling sorrow not to love you? It is not so to me. Tell me, by your mercy, O Lord, my God, what you are to me. “Say to my soul, I am your salvation.” So speak that I may hear. Behold, the ears of my heart are before you, O Lord; open them and “say to my soul, I am your salvation.” I will hasten after that voice, and I will lay hold upon you. Hide not your face from me . . .

6. The house of my soul is too narrow for you to come in to me; let it be enlarged by you. It is in ruins; do you restore it. There is much about it that must offend your eyes; I confess and know it. But who will cleanse it? Or, to whom shall I cry but to you? “Cleanse you me from my secret faults,” O Lord, “and keep back your servant from strange sins.” “I believe, and therefore do I speak.” But you, O Lord, you know. Have I not confessed my transgressions unto you, O my God; and hast you not put away the iniquity of my heart? I do not contend in judgment with you, who are truth itself; and I would not deceive myself, lest my iniquity lie even to itself. I do not, therefore, contend in judgment with you, for “if you, Lord, should mark iniquities, O Lord, who shall stand?”

CHAPTER XII

19. But in this time of childhood . . . I had no love of learning, and hated to be driven to it. Yet I was driven to it just the same, and good was done for me, even though I did not do it well, for I would not have learned if I had not been forced to it. For no man does well against his will, even if what he does is a good thing. Neither did they who forced me do well, but the good that was done me came from you, my God. For they did not care about the way in which I would use what they forced me to learn, and took it for granted that it was to satisfy the inordinate desires of a rich beggary and a shameful glory. But you, Lord, by whom the hairs of our head are numbered, did use for my good the error of all who pushed me on to study: . . . And I—though so small a boy yet so great a sinner—was not punished without warrant. Thus by the instrumentality of those who did not do well, you did well for me; and by my own sin you did justly punish me. For it is even as you have ordained: that every inordinate affection brings on its own punishment.

I like Augustine's portrayal of the Soul as a House. He describes the house as being too narrow, and the God is the one who can enlarge it. He describes the house as being in ruins, with God as the mighty architect who can rebuild it. He describes the house as offensive, as something that only God himself can cleanse. I can definitely see his viewpoint there! Sometimes I feel that the soul is truly in ruin, that only through the power of the mighty architect can I get through. Without God, I am nothing, just a speck on this planet for a short time of existence. God, the soul enlarger, the home repairer, the cleanser of all unrighteousness, gives meaning and joy to this life, and excitement for the life to come.

Remembering a Furry Friend

This blog is supposed to be geared towards my reflections in studying Christian History. In light of the events that have transpired over the weekend, I feel justified in a different task for today. Let me flash back to about two years ago, when our wonderful cat, Ezlo, went missing for a couple of days. He came back to us, almost in one piece, yet his back leg was both broken and dislocated. This was due to some bites from what the vet described as a medium sized dog. So we casted the foot, and left him with a bit of a gimp from the dislocation. We were given orders that he needed to be an indoor cat from now on. Unfortunately, Ezlo would hear none of this, and we were constantly trying to keep him from going outside.

Forward back to our current time. Ezlo had adjusted well for having a dislocated leg; he could still climb over our six foot fence, and he loved to be outside. The other day a similar scenario played out, he went missing for a day or two, and came back hobbling, yet another victim to an attack. This left he lying on my bed for three days. I would put him outside so he could go to the bathroom, but a cat that can't squat because of a dislocated leg is not a very happy cat. He also had lost a lot of weight. It was difficult to see, because he was so fluffy, but once you got past the fur it was obvious that things were looking grim.

Sadly, we had to put down our furry friend Ezlo. I cannot question that it was the right thing to do; he was not doing well, and his outlook was bleak. He couldn't stand with being cooped up in a house, and I'm sure his latest condition would have limited him even more.

I will cherish the joy that Ezlo has brought me and my family. My beautiful daughter Ava loved her "keekee" very much, and truth be known, Ezlo was Andrea's little boy. I am thankful for the past five years I have had to spend with that little furry friend.

Dissension and Politics in Religion

I just got done reading about the several different councils that met during the first 7 centuries of the Early Church under the authority of the Roman Empire. The councils usually met because there was a conflict in theology, specifically in understanding the relationship between God the Father and Jesus Christ the Son. Some argued that God was superior to Jesus, others argued that they were made of the same "stuff" or "substance". These councils were very political in nature, and in many cases, the end resolution was decided in part by the influence of the current reigning Roman Emperor. Once a resolution was reached, it was customary for the winning side to condemn the losing side as anathema, which is a nice word for banished or excommunicated. In many cases, the opinion of the emperor would change, or a new emperor would come to power, and tables would be turned, and those formerly excommunicated would be reinstated. Some, such as Arius, were to be accepted back even after being accused and excommunicated for heresy (his death prevented this from happening). In every instance, the councils built on the work of others, further separating what was the "winner" from the loser. It makes me wonder how much of the outcome of these councils was decided by the influence held on the emperor. It seems that the easiest way in this case to get your position agreed and accepted is to have the emperor be on your side. The politics of lobbying the emperor for credibility in the council had to be at least thought of, if not acted on. The outcome of these councils is far reaching; their decisions have a huge impact on the way we think about the person and savior known as Jesus Christ. If they had turned a different way, we might have a very different perspective on who are Savior is, and what he can do as savior.

Tertullian

Tertullian was one of our early church fathers. He vehemently fought for the Gospel, exposing (in a ridiculing and almost sarcastic way) the distortions of the Gospel that the early Gnostic sect portrayed. Tertullian was well versed, knowing his way around the work of the Apostles, and their contemporaries that followed them. Tertullian was a bold leader, one ready to defend the Gospel at all costs. He was disillusioned by the Early Church leadership, specifically those in Rome, and left the Orthodox Church and defected to a group of puritanists called Montanists. How is it that a man of such intellect, passion, and persuasion can become so disillusioned with the Church structure that he would leave? I think it goes to show that when disagreement gets a foothold in a church body, division is more than likely to occur. So how do we remedy disagreement? Is disagreement something that needs to be remedied? To quote 90s Christian Ska Group, the Orange County Supertones: "If we all love the same God, can we agree to disagree?" Possibly, division may not be necessarily a bad thing. Look at Paul and Barnabus; these pillars of the early church had a logistical disagreement about who should be apart of their traveling party, and the disagreement was so strong that it caused these men to divide and go and work in different directions. I would like to think that the work of the Gospel was not hindered by their division, because the mission of the Gospel remained, and both Paul and Barnabus continued the work they felt they were called to do. I believe that if Paul and Barnabus would have remained together, their disagreement would actually hinder their work. In this case, the only option was for them to go their separate ways. I think it is important in our modern times to sometimes take the way of Paul and Barnabus and choose for amicable division when disagreement arises. Disagreement has the ability to fester in the hearts of men, and bitterness is sure to follow. When disagreement arises in the church body, we should try to sort it out, or part our ways, if nothing more than for the sake of furthering the gospel. To do so otherwise would be to place a direct hinderance on the work of the Gospel.

The Didache

In our class this week, we read a little bit out of the Didache, otherwise known as the Teachings of the Apostles. I was impressed in how clear cut these instructions were; the first six chapters read much like the teachings of Jesus on the Sermon on the Mount. In reading these, it is easy for me to understand why the early church was so relentlessly persecuted by their Roman rulers. To live as a Christian in the Roman (and in our Modern) times is so backward, so foreign to the me-first way of living. We are called to give our cloak to those in need... not the old argyle socks and lime green corduroy pants that we wore in the 70s, but the very clothing off of our back. We are called to turn the other cheek, to love our enemies, and pray for those who persecute you. This way of thinking mocks the adage that the strong are the ones who survive. No wonder the Roman government wanted these radicals silenced. Yet here we are... the Roman Republic/Empire has long ceased to be, and we, the Christians are still here. There is something to be said about the staying power of the Christian way of living.

The Early Church Fathers

In this weeks lesson, we are talking about the Early church, or Apostolistic Fathers. These are the guys who were influential in the Early Church post Peter, Paul, and the other Apostles. These include Clement of Rome, Polycarp, and Ignatius, among others. These men, like many of the Apostles, died painful deaths for what they believed in, yet they still had the intent and focus to spread the gospel. Interestingly enough, a large reason why Christianity spread was simply due to the spread of the Roman Empire. As the Empire grew, Christianity grew with it. It is not that cut and dry; the work of the Early Church Fathers was crucial to the growth and knowledge of the Early Church. They were charged with organizing groups and leadership, being arbiters for schisms and strife in local churches, and promoting the truth of the Gospel in the face of distortion and outright lies. For all their work, many were tortured and killed in gratuitous ways. As Christians, we have a firm foundation of self-sacrificing men with a desire to see the gospel spread over the entire known world. It behooves us to carry on their example.

Reflection on Augustine

For this particular reading, I am to reflect on a writing of Augustine, an early church leader:

Augustine’s Confessions, Reading 1

BOOK ONE

In God’s searching presence, Augustine undertakes to plumb the depths of his memory to trace the mysterious pilgrimage of grace that his life has been -- and to praise God for his constant and omnipotent grace. In a mood of sustained prayer, he recalls what he can of his infancy, his learning to speak, and his childhood experiences in school. He concludes with a paean of grateful praise to God.

CHAPTER I

1. “You are great, O Lord, and greatly to be praised; great is your power, and infinite is your wisdom.” And man desires to praise you, for he is a part of your creation; he bears his mortality about with him and carries the evidence of his sin and the proof that you resist the proud. Still he desires to praise you, this man who is only a small part of your creation. You have prompted him, that he should delight to praise you, for you have made us for yourself and restless is our heart until it comes to rest in you. Grant me, O Lord, to know and understand whether first to invoke you or to praise you; whether first to know you or call upon you. But who can invoke you, knowing you not? For he who knows you not may invoke you as another than you are. It may be that we should invoke you in order that we may come to know you. But “how shall they call on him in whom they have not believed? Or how shall they believe without a preacher?” Now, “they shall praise the Lord who seek him,” for “those who seek shall find him,” and, finding him, shall praise him. I will seek you, O Lord, and call upon you. I call upon you, O Lord, in my faith that you have given me, which you have inspired in me through the humanity of your Son, and through the ministry of your preacher.

Outler, Albert, C., Translator and editor. Augustine Confessions. Holiness Data Ministry, Digital Edition, 1999. Abridged and modernized English by Floyd T. Cunningham, 2003. All journaling assignments in this module are from Augustine Confessions and are from this source and are in the public domain.

I think the phrase that stood out most to me in that paragraph was "restless is our hearts until they come to rest in you". You can't speak to any truth more than that! This world is nothing but huge examples of different avenues that people try to find rest in. Money, fame, fortune, power, drugs, sex, all of these things do not provide the rest that comes from knowing God through Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior. Just recently, a retired professional football player was picked up for Statutory Rape. This man had it all: fame, fortune, multiple homes, respect, and a legacy that preceded him. He played football before I was even old enough to understand it, yet I know his name, the team he played for, and the things that made him famous. Yet all these things in their earthly brilliance were not enough to give rest to this man's heart. He unfortunately tried to find it in the hands of a young woman whom he "thought was 19". Sadly enough, this is another example of the restless heart of humanity, that as Augustine says, only finds true rest in God through his Son Jesus Christ, our lord and savior.

Welcome Back to Christian Heritage!

Greetings all in the blogging world!

We are back on track to start a new course of study module. This time we will be taking up the History of Christianity, beginning with the early church and going up to the pre-reformation church. I have to admit that history is one of my favorite subjects (not my wife's or my sister in law's) and I am excited about the challenges that wait ahead. I have a deep interest in learning about where we as Christians came from, because it can shed a lot of light on what lies ahead. I am especially interested in the crusade times under the Holy Roman Empire... I might watch Kingdom of Heaven tonight to celebrate. Everwho, this is my prayer for this module:

Lord, I pray that you will reveal your will in my life for the path you want me to take. I pray that in looking at the past, it can shed light on where we have come from, the mistakes we have made, the triumphs and the things we have overcome, and the glorious hope for what the future holds. Bless me indeed during this module.

Jayson - in cursive-like letters.

Respect your Wife!

I have been doing devotional readings from several books over the last year or so. One of them is The Top Ten Ways To Love Your Wife By Hans & Donna Finzel (I think I have met his brother Franz, and he pumped me up). The married authors take on the misconceptions commonly placed on women and their roles in the marriage relationship. One of the things that stuck out to me today is the fact that a lot of times men command and expect women to take care of their domains and responsibilities, and then they go out and try to second guess the women when they execute their plan. It is a situation I know I have found myself in. I can think of an uncountable amount of times when I have come in to "assist" my wife, and just gone and made the situation worse. The truth is that women are not naive; they know what they are doing, they know that they can make choices for themselves, think critically, and solve problems on levels that I can't even begin to comprehend. Give the ladies in your life the respect they deserve, because if they are anything like my wife, they work so hard and do very well at the things they do.

Where is the heart at?

I found this passage of scripture from the 17th chapter of Jeremiah in part because one of the verses was from a devotional I started reading. I think it is a very powerful message:

⁹ The heart is deceitful above all things
and beyond cure.
Who can understand it?

¹⁰ "I the LORD search the heart
and examine the mind,
to reward a man according to his conduct,
according to what his deeds deserve."

I think what I like about this passage is that it is an intimate conversation, just Jeremiah and God. Jeremiah asks God about the deception of the heart, how easily it sways the mind of the individual. God respond in that he searches the heart, and focuses not on the whims of the heart swaying to and fro, but instead on what pours out of the heart and mind: the actions that an individual takes. To be rewarded not because we think highly of ourselves, or because we take a shower every day, or don't eat our own dandruff is irrelevant; God, in all his might and power, rewards us according to what are deeds deserve. May I live in such a way that merits the great reward of blessing from God our father!

Concluding Living Ethical Lives

I find myself on the last day of coursework for Living Ethical Lives. It has been a very pleasant journey through this course work, and I have to admit that I am saddened that this course is over. I have felt a strong interaction and engagement with the course work, such that I have not experienced in the last couple of course I have taken.

It was greatly beneficial for me to better understand the connection of theology with ethics. It is impossible for the Christian to know the moral way of living without an intimate, connected relationship with God through Jesus Christ. It is amazing in that as you grow in faith and relationship with God the Father, the way you ought to live becomes clearer, easier to understand, and easier to apply in a practical way. Needless to say there will be times when I am faced with ethical dilemmas, and I will need the prayerful guidance and support of my Lord and Savior to know which way to go, but I find a peace in knowing that I have him to turn to.

So where do we go from here? I hope to continue the journaling journey until my next course starts. Until then, this will probably be a forum for my interactions with my Lord, Be it through my devotions or through experiences in my day that draw me closer to him. I hope you continue on this journey with me.

Visiting a Friend

I know this blog is supposed to be a log of my journey through the land of Living Ethical Lives, but I don't feel that it is really serving its intended purpose if it is not at times a carry all for living my life. So I feel the need to comment about the events of my day.

I had the opportunity today to accompany a young girl to jail to visit her father, who is a dear friend of mine. For the first time in my life, I had the opportunity to sit down and watch a father and daughter visit and converse with each other through a two inch sheet of plexi-glass. I left that visit stricken by the love this father had for his daughter. He didn't have to say it or express it in any way; you could see it in his eyes, and the way she responded to him. I have to admit it is something that goes beyond my comprehension, the love a father has for his daughter. It reminds me of the love my father has for me. It truly transcends all my human understanding. As Easter Sunday approaches at dawn, it was a good reminder to see the love a parent has for a child, and the kind of love that my abba father has for me.